It’s been a challenging week. We’re at the in law’s because Great Grandpa passed away (we had the official Celebration of Life on Monday), plus my two year old is teething with her back molars, and this was the time I created in my schedule to potty train, so I’m kind of trying to do that too. It’s a bit nutso! I’m sure you can relate…
Sooooo, all that is to say that I crowdsourced this newsletter from our wise and super supportive Facebook community, the Talking To Kids About Sex Parent Support Group. I asked them, “What’s the #1 tip you’d give another parent re talking with your kids about sex & relationships?”
Here’s what they said:
“Answer all questions honestly, accurately and simply.” – Susan
“It’s never too early! And consent, always consent.” – Sarah
“Do it, don’t avoid it because you aren’t sure or comfortable.” – Shannon
“Give your kids an accurate vocabulary for their body parts from an early age.” – Chris
“Early & often! Start with those early observations when someone they know is pregnant, and just follow their questions from there.” – Jennifer
“…make consent a priority in the conversation (for both boys and girls!) While having a discussion about sex is important, consent is a piece that is often overlooked in that conversation.” – Natalie
“Early, often, ongoing conversations and teachable moments. Be available, listen and open to learning from and with your kid.” – Margie from HUSHeducation in Melbourne, Australia
“Start as young as possible.” – Nicky
“Haha. I misread your name and thought this was from a personal friend. My comment was going to be “Follow Anya Manes first.” I need to come up with something else now… I would advise young parents to start in infancy and make it natural. I wish I had been allowed to teach my own kids that they have the right to say no to being touched, including unwanted hugs.” – Joyce
Have something else to add? Comment below and tell us your #1 tip! Questions welcomed as well.
Enjoy this last gasp of summer break with your kids!
Like Joyce’s comment – “You are the boss of your own body.” This has backfired on me, though, as my kids will often say, “I’m the boss of my body,” when I tell them to floss, for example. To this I say, “I’m the boss of teaching you how to take care of your body, but you can tell me not to touch you whenever you want. I can’t put my hands in your mouth if you don’t want me too, but you do have to floss.”
What should we avoid when we talk about sex & relationship with teenagers? How careful should we be in talking about it with them?
The main things to avoid is lecturing or using scare tactics. Those are the places to be careful, not so much around the information you share.